Making Adjustments
by NickyM96
Summary: JASAM 2006. Sometimes you have to make adjustments in order to survive.
1. Chapter 1

**Title:** Making Adjustments  
**Author:** NickyM96  
**Rating:** PG-13 to R  
**Spoilers:** Well, since I haven't seen past the May 16th ep, this is only based on my interpretation of the spoilers for the May 22nd ep.  
**Summary:** Sometimes you have to make adjustments in order to survive.

**Disclaimer:** If ONLY these characters were mine . . . but alas, they aren't. So I have to borrow them and do what I can to make them happy, if only for a short time.

**Notes:** This story was written during one of my earlier GH sabbaticals in May of 2006. It's set just after Sam's shooting, around the time Jason has dumped her and she goes to live with Alexis.

**Character Assassination Warning: **I'm not much of a fan of Alexis, so if you are, you might not be very happy with this story.

* * *

Making Adjustments  
1

* * *

"Sam, Sweetheart. Why don't you come have breakfast with me, Ric, and the girls?"

She asks every morning and every morning, Sam refuses. Sam knows she should be using this time to bond with her family, but she can't. Not yet. The pain she feels is a debilitating pain. It's not from the surgery. It's not a pain a pill can fix. It's a pain she feels in her heart from not being with the man she loves.

"Jason," she sighs softly. But loud enough for Alexis to hear.

"Sam, really. The man dumps you while you're in the hospital and you're still pining for him?"

Sam's eyes fill with hot, angry tears, but she refuses to let them fall. She refuses to let Alexis share her grief.

"As you can see, we can take care of you just as well as Jason ever did, probably better. You'll be safe with us. Which is more than Jason could ever guarantee."

Sam rolls over in bed and stares out the wall, ignoring the rest of what Alexis says. It's all the same. Everything she says has been the same since Sam came to live with her.

_Jason is bad for her._

_Jason is dangerous._

_Jason almost got her killed._

_Jason broke her heart._

Well, that part is true. Jason did break her heart. Smashed it into a million pieces. And she can't figure out why. She's knows he's afraid for her, but he's never let his fear get the best of him. Something else is at work here and Sam has a feeling the woman lecturing her has something to do with it.

". . . don't have to worry about depending on Jason anymore," Alexis drones on. "His monetary support isn't worth your life. You can do much better than him. And until you get back on your feet, we can give you everything you need."

Sam cringes and squeezes her eyes shut, one rebel tear escaping her defenses. She's grateful when Alexis finally leaves her alone, leaving her with one thought in her head.

_All I need is Jason._

_- - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - -_

She usually waits until they've all left for their day before sneaking downstairs for an apple or something. And only because she can't take her medication on an empty stomach. But today, they're apparently running late. Sam can hear them talking as they gather up last minute things to leave.

"It's been a week. She needs to snap out of this."

"What do you expect. Her heart's broken, Alexis. Plus, the two of you never had a cordial relationship. It's going to take time."

Ric surprises her being the voice of reason.

"Jason's hold on her was much deeper than I thought," Alexis sighs in digust. "He really did a number on her, making her so emotionally dependent on him. He's the worst kind of abuser."

"You really think he abused her?"

"How else do you explain that broken shell of a woman upstairs in that room? Sam is destroyed because Jason left her. No woman should depend on any man for money or validation or survival. It's sick and if I could send Jason to prison for turning her into such a pathetic creature, I would."

Sam bites down hard on her lip to keep the string of curses from flowing. But again, Ric surprises her with what he says next.

"Then you'd have to send Sam to prison as well. Because from what I've seen, Jason isn't any better off than Sam is. I honestly don't know what's worse, that cold stare of his, or this now constant look of pain on his face. It comes off of him in waves and it makes even me feel a little sorry for him. If Sam was emotionally dependent on Jason, then he was just as emotionally dependent on her."

"That's different," Alexis scoffs. "He used her and abused her."

"He loved her, Alexis. Maybe not in a way that you or I could understand, but they love each other. And being apart is killing them both. I know you don't care about Jason, but is that what you want for your daughter?"

"She'll live. She'll survive. Especially if Jason stays out of her life. Even he agrees with me. Why else would he broken things off with her?"

"Because you made him," Ric reminds her. "You used his love for Sam against him and made him believe she'd be better off without him."

"She is better off without him."

The front door opens and closes, leaving the room in silence. Sam sneaks from her hiding place, tears streaming down her face as the truth finally sinks in. The break up wasn't Jason's idea. This pain she's feeling, her aching heart, her broken spirit is all her mother's doing.

Surprisingly, Sam finds herself accepting, even understanding of Alexis' reasoning. Alexis wanted to protect her. That's plain to see. If it was only about protecting her, Sam could even possibly see herself forgiving Alexis and putting it behind them. But Sam finds it unforgiveable the pain Jason has suffered. Alexis had no right to hurt him the way she did.

Sam's first instinct is to go upstairs and pack. But she has no place to go. She has no other family. No friends. No money. And she can't go back to the penthouse until she can convince Jason to forget about what Alexis said and come back to her. For now, she's going to have to put up with Alexis' overbearing meddling and come up with another plan. One that will get her out of this house and back with Jason where she belongs.

The door opening shocks her from her deep contemplation.

"Sam! You're up and about. That's good," Alexis beams. "Don't overdo it, though. Get back in bed if you're feeling tired."

The woman buzzes around the room before letting out an 'Ah ha' when she finds her cell phone.

"Forgot my phone," she explains. "I'm late. I have to get to work. Dinner tonight?"

"We'll see," Sam says, trying to force a smile, not wanting to tip her hand and let the woman know she's onto her. "You should get going. Have a nice day."

"Thank you, Sweetheart. You get some rest."

Sam lets her scowl return when Alexis leaves again, her former hatred and anger for the woman back in full force. But, the woman gave her an idea. She can only hope that it works.

_- - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - -_

The contracts on his desk are begging for his attention, but he can't seem to care. To the outside world, he's tougher and colder than he's ever been. When it comes to work and his enemies, he's become even more efficient and organized. Frightening, even. Work is the only thing that keeps him from thinking about her. About Sam.

But at times like this when he's alone in the penthouse they used to share, memories of her dance all around him. He can't help but miss her until his heart aches. He misses holding her and touching her. He misses cooking for her while she pretends to help. But they both know she can't do much more than chop the vegetables or fix the salad. He misses her smell. He tried spraying her perfume around the house, but it's not the same. Her essence is missing and the sweet scent just leaves him nauseous. He misses her voice. As much as he pretended her incessant talking drove him crazy, he loved the chatter. Her voice soothed him. Because when he heard it, he know that she was okay.

"Boss, you got a call," Bernie says, interrupting his thoughts. It's probably a good thing, though. He needs to get back to work.

"Take a message. I'm busy," Jason grumbles, picking up his pen in one hand and a contract in the other.

"She says it's important. She says . . . "

"She?" Jason asks quickly, interrupting the man. "It's Sam?"

His heart pounds with hope. He's been trying to convince her that they need to be apart, but his resolve has been weakening with each day he's not with her.

"No. She says she has an important tip for you . . . and only you. Says her name is Raven."

A secret smile spreads across his face.

"I think we're done here for the day," Jason says, dismissing the man. "Why don't you go check on things at the warehouse. I'll need a report by tomorrow afternoon."

"Yes, Mr. Morgan," Bernie nods, walking out the office.

Jason waits until he hears the front door close before picking up his private line.

"This is Jason. How may I help you?"

"Actually, I think it's me who can help you."

The familiar sultry voice and fake Houston accent makes him smile. And then ache . . . in places he's tried to ignore for the past week.

"Sam," he whispers reverently.

"No, Sugar. It's Raven. And I'm going to make all your dreams come true."

"Is that so?" he asks, playing along. "And how would a woman like you know what my dreams are?"

She lets out a deep throaty laugh that makes him bite back a groan.

"Baby, it's my business to know what kind of dreams men like you have."

"Is that so?"

"Mmm hmm."

"So tell me. Tell me about my dreams and how you plan on making them come true."

"First you talk to me. Tell me about this woman you're longing for. This woman you can't live without," she challenges him.

"She's my everything. I love her with my whole heart. But I couldn't keep her safe, so I had to let her go."

"I bet that wasn't an easy decision for you to make," she says, making him go quiet. "In fact, I bet it wasn't your decision at all."

"It's for the best," he says quickly, as if trying to convince himself. "She can't be safe with me."

"I bet you've always kept her safe. I bet you're the only one she's ever felt safe with. I bet she'd rather risk facing danger with you than living another day without you."

"Sam . . . "

"Raven," she corrects him. "You're talking to Raven, Jason. Raven can make you feel much better. Raven can take away the loneliness."

"Nothing can take away this loneliness," he confesses, sighing as he tries to hold back his tears.

"Raven can help you remember the good times," she says softly. "Close your eyes and picture her. Picture what it was like when the two of you looked at each other. Think of how staring into her eyes made your heart skip a beat. Now reach out and stroke her soft cheek."

Jason closes his eyes and the images pop into his head, the scene she's describing playing out just as he remembers it. His fingers itch to feel her soft skin beneath them. His mouth waters as his aching tongue longs to trace her juicy lips.

"Kiss her, Jason. You know you could never resist the oasis of her mouth."

He can almost feel the phantom warmth as he remembers their kisses. He'd nibble first the bottom one, then the top. Then he'd delve inside for a deeper exploration, capturing her tongue and gently sucking it into his own mouth, a little trick that leaves her trembling in his arms.

"Your hands don't stay still. They're everywhere all at once all over her body. Her neck. Her arms. Her breasts."

Thoughts of her lush breasts cause him to gasp, shocking himself back to reality. He looks around and growls in frustration to find himself alone.

"I have to see you. Now."

"Can you arrange it?"

"Can you get away?" he counters. "Alexis has people watching you."

"It's what I do, Baby," she says, slipping back into her 'Raven' voice. "You name the time and place and I'll be there."

He shakes his head at her determination. She's so willful and stubborn. Someone tells her what to do, she wants to do the complete opposite. It's one of the things he loves about her.

"I love you. I love you so much. I'd die if anything happened to you again," he confesses.

"Nothing can hurt me worse than not being with you, Jason. I can't do it another day."

"Me either," he whispers. "This is so much harder than I thought it would be. But I have to keep you safe."

"I will be safe," she promises. "No one will know about this. It'll be our secret until we figure out a better way."

"What are you going to tell your mother?" he ask warily. The woman is a thorn in his side, but she is Sam's mother. She's going to be a part of their lives forever.

"Let me handle Alexis," she spits out angrily. "She may be my mother, but I refuse to let her run my life. And the next time she tries, she won't have a place in my life. I realized this week that no matter what I thought before, she's not what I need. I mean it's nice to know I come from someone, but there's never going to be a connection. Too much has happened between us for that to ever happen. And further more . . . "

Jason almost laughs out loud, never imagining the joy he'd feel at hearing her ramble on and on. He doesn't know how he even considered being without this woman. Call it a temporary lapse of judgement. Call it mere stupidity. But he's now seen the light.

A feeling of peace settles over him. Suddenly, he's not so worried anymore. He knows what he has to do to settle this once and for all. It's going to take some time, but as long as he knows he has her by his side he'll survive.

"This will be over soon," he promises. "I realized some things this week, too. This life . . . it means nothing without you, Sam. Sonny and I may have settled our differences, for the most part, but the fact remains, it was all about him. The work. The partnership. The friendship. Everything. I made every sacrifice for him, but he couldn't do the same. I'm through living like that. I'm going to live for me. And for you. From now on, it's going to be about us."

"Jason, what are you saying?"

"I'm saying, I'm done. With Sonny. With the business. With this life. I'm going to do whatever it takes to get you back and keep you safe."

"Don't give up your life because you think it's what I want or what Alexis wants. Jason, you . . . "

"I am doing this for us, Sam. Not because of your mom. But because it's time for me to make some adjustments in the way I live. I can't keep on worrying about Sonny or Emily or Carly. And as much as I love Michael and Morgan, they have parents. Sonny and Carly need to be the ones making sacrifices for those boys, not me."

"Wow," she gasps in shock at his sudden resolve. "I don't know what to say. I don't know what to think. Jason Morgan. A law abiding citizen. I can't picture it."

"I never said anything about 'law abiding'," he laughs. "I'll probably be about as law abiding as you are."

"Whew, you scared me for a minute. I thought my bad boy was disappearing on me," she says, taking on the sexy tone in her voice again. "You know I like my boys bad."

"I'll be as bad as you want me to be."

"Ooh, is that a promise?"

"I guess you'll find out soon enough. Let me know when you can get away and I'll send a car for you. We'll go somewhere special."

He's reluctant to hang up the phone, but realizes the sooner she goes, the sooner he can get to her. And this time, he doesn't plan on ever letting her go.

To be continued . . .


	2. Chapter 2

**Making Adjustments  
2**

* * *

_Jason has some explaining to do and as usual, Sam makes him  
realize that things work out better when they work together._

* * *

He tries not to be startled when the door quietly opens. He knows it's her. His love. His Sam. Coming home to him.

"Jason," she calls out softly into the darkened cabin. "Are you here?"

He lights a candle to be a beacon to her, showing her the way. As her soft footsteps get closer, his heart begins to beat louder and he's sure she can hear.

A few more long, endless moments and he sees her walk into the room. Or more like, limp. His heart plummets as he remembers that just barely a week ago, she was in the hospital being treated for both back surgery and a brain surgery.

"You're still hurt," he winces, rushing to her side. He bends down and swoops her up into his arms, carrying her over to the rose petal covered bed. He could practically kick himself for dragging her out of her sick bed. "You shouldn't be out like this."

She gives him a sweet smile before stopping his self flagellation with an even sweeter kiss that fills his heart with more love than he ever imagined possible.

"Hello to you too," she giggles, watching his ears turn red the way they do in the early stages of his arousal.

"Sam, you're . . ."

Again, she presses her lips to his to stop his flow of self blame for whatever he feels he needs to atone for. It's been too long and she doesn't want to spend what little time they have worrying about her health.

"I'm fine," she insists, nuzzling her in the crook of his neck. She presses kisses wherever she can reach. Kisses that send shivers of excitement all throughout his body. "I missed you. I missed this."

"I missed you too," he growls when her lips dampen a particularly sensitive spot. "So much, Sam. I thought I'd never hold you like this again. But you just got out of the hospital."

"True. And sadly, after the trip to get here, I'm not really up for much more than cuddling," she frowns in disappointment. "Are you all right with that? I just had to see you? And touch you. Have you hold me. That's all the medicine I need."

He reclines on the bed, getting her settled next to him. She immediately cuddles up to him, wincing when moving a certain way brings her some pain.

"Are you . . . "

"I told you I'm fine," she insists. "Just a twinge. It'll pass."

He wraps his arms around her, taking care not to aggravate any of her wounded areas. They both settle into the comfort of each others arms, each gently stroking wherever they can reach on the other's body. The light touching leads to kissing and Jason takes the opportunity to show her exactly how much he's missed her.

"You still okay?" he pants, trying desperately to calm his pounding heart. He gets so excited just touching her. More excited than he wants to let on since they can't do anything about it.

"I'm wonderful," she purrs, stretching catlike in his arms. "No pain or anything. I told you you're all the medicine I need."

The urge to nibble on her already swollen lips is too much to resist. He gives into his compulsion, his gentle bites soothed by his warm tonge. It makes her whimper.

"Jason," she whines when he stops, calming them both with a kiss on her forehead.

"You're too irresistible," he explains, the husky rasp is voice another sign of his arousal. "We need to calm down some. I just never thought I'd hold you like this. But now that you're here, I can barely control myself."

As their heart rates begin to settle to a more normal pace, she sits up and looks down at him with a worried look in her eyes.

"This isn't just a one time thing, is it? You're not going to get my hopes up just to leave me again, are you?"

"Sam," he sighs. "I left you because it was for the best."

"Your decision or Alexis'?"

"I . . ." he stutters, not knowing what to say. "I don't want to answer that. But you know me. You know nobody can make me do what I don't want to do."

"So you _want_ to be separated from me?" she tries to clarify. "Because if you do, this certainly isn't the way to accomplish that."

"Sam, don't."

"Don't what?" she yells. "Don't be confused at what's going on here? Don't be mad that you let my mother talk you into leaving me? Don't expect to see you again after this? What, Jason? What are you trying to say?"

"I love you, Sam," he says, and her anger abates just a little. "But I also want you to be safe. My life is too dangerous for you."

"That sounds like something straight from Alexis' mouth. Is that what she told you? Did she make you feel guilty for me being in your life?"

"Your mom is worried about you, Sam. And with good reason. You got shot with a bullet meant for me. If you weren't out on that terrace with me, then this wouldn't be happening."

"Okay, I'm getting scared now. Because you're sounding exactly like her. What did she do, brainwash you or something?"

That brings a smile to his face, the idea being so ridiculous.

"Jason, since when do you listen to anything Alexis has to say? Why would you start now?"

"Because she's right. My life _is_ dangerous. And apparently I _can't_ keep you safe."

"Jason you've always kept me safe," she counters.

"Not when you got shot in my arms. With a bullet meant to kill me."

He slips from the bed and walks over to the window. The cabin sits on a remote mountain where no one could reach without him knowing. He made sure of that before letting her meet him there. They're safe there. But how can he guarantee her safety any other time?

"Jason," she sighs, walking up behind him. She wraps her arms around his waist and rests her cheek on his back. "You saved me. When I got shot, you took me to safety and let the doctors treat me. When I needed surgery, you let them do it, no matter what stunts Alexis tried to pull to stop you. You refused to let me die."

"And now, I'm refusing to let you get hurt again. I can't stand to see you hurt because of me."

"Even though that's what you're doing now by staying away from me?"

"But at least you'll live. At least you won't have to deal with getting caught in the crossfire of bullets meant for me."

"Says who?" she challenges.

"What?"

"Who says that bullet was meant for you? I mean, besides my mother, of course," she says, rolling her eyes.

"Who'd want to kill you? It makes sense they were shooting for me."

"Then why didn't they? Shoot you, that is?" she wonders, trying to make him think. "Come on, Jason. You could have been dead several times over while you were out on that balcony. Why would the shooter wait until you picked me up and spun me around to shoot at you?"

"Maybe the shooter wasn't ready until then," he supposes.

She gives him a knowing glare, letting him know she doesn't believe that. And she feels a glimmer of hope when she sees that he has some doubts himself.

"Think about it, Jason. You've done this yourself. What do you do when you're set to take someone out."

He cringes, uncomfortable with discussing this with her. But she seems determined not to let it go, so he goes along with her.

"I find my mark. Make sure I know where he's going to be and set up and wait for him."

"My shooter was set up across from the Metro Court. Jason, you were in jail that day. And you hardly ever go to the Metro Court. Why would the shooter be waiting for you there?"

"Maybe he knew you'd be there and assumed I'd show up, too," he says with a shrug, not quite believing what he's saying either.

"Okay, even though that's a big assumption, let's just go with that reasoning."

She steps away from him and walks across the room, by the door. Then she opens the door and takes a few more steps down the hall.

"Let's just say I was here that night and you were there. Turn the timer on your watch."

He gives her a confused look, but does what she asks anyway.

"Now pretend to write me a note."

Again, he's not sure where she's going, but again he follows her instructions.

"Okay, I get the note. I read the note. I look up and spot you and walk towards you."

She walks into the room and over to Jason, stopping just in front of him.

"Okay, tell me how much time has passed and tell me what you've been doing that whole time."

He looks at his watch and smiles, finally understanding her line of thinking.

"It's been almost 2 minutes. Add to that the time it took for me to first find you inside the party and then track down a waitress to send you the note. All that time, I was just standing there, an easy target for anyone trying to shoot me."

"Exactly," she says, returning his smile. "The shooter probably had from five to ten minutes he could have shot you, but he didn't."

"Because he wasn't aiming for me," Jason realizes. "You were the target all along."

He stumbles over to the bed and falls on it, not sure how to process what they just figured out.

"Somebody's trying to kill you, Sam," he says slowly as all the pieces begin to click into place. "That shooter was aiming for you."

"Now all we have to do is figure out why, then we'll probably figure out who'd want to kill me."

"Well, it can't be that long of a list."

"You'd be surprised," she confesses. "I've made a few dangerous enemies myself, Jason. Before I even stepped foot into Port Charles."

"Someone who'd want to kill you?"

"Possibly," she shrugs, sitting down next to him. "So I guess I need you now more than ever. Whoever shot me has to know that I'm not dead. What if they try again? You're the only one I trust to protect me."

She throws an arm across his shoulder and kisses his cheek.

"No one else is big enough. Strong enough. Sexy enough," she whispers into his ear, grabbing the lobe with her teeth and laving the gentle bites with her tongue.

"Sexy?" he asks, embarrassed when his voice squeaks like a 15 year old.

"Oh yeah," she practically purrs, pressing a line of kisses down his neck. She pushes him back onto the bed and crawls over him, her knees landing on either side of his hips. "My big, bad, and oh so very sexy protector."

She finally stops the teasing kisses that land everywhere but his lips and allows him to capture her mouth in an almost violently crushing way.

"You should make a list . . . of who'd want to kill you . . . and give it to Mac," he says, between kisses. "They're looking for someone who'd be after me."

"We can do that later. Much later," she grins seductively. "Right now, I'm ready to have my way with you."

With strength he never imagined she had, she rolls them over, with him landing on top of her. His hips fall into the cradle of her parted thighs and the move brings a growl from him that neither of them had ever heard before. Her eyes stretch wide open at the feral look on his face.

"Later," he repeats her declaration from earlier. "First, _I'm_ going to have _my_ way with you."

She can only close her eyes and moan as he lowers his lips to her neck, all other thoughts racing from her mind. They can figure out later who's trying to kill her. Hopefully much _much_ later.

To be continued . . .


	3. Chapter 3

Making Adjustments  
3

_Sam's ready to get back to her life. But how will Alexis react?  
_

* * *

Sometimes it's hard to believe this is the home to two small children. There are no handprints on the wall. No residue from spit up or the unfortunate potty mishap on the carpet. There's never even so much as a throw pillow out of place. Viola looks around with a sigh, thanking God she didn't grow up in a stifled environment like this. Sometimes she feels bad for enforcing the strict rules and guidelines Alexis has set up for Kristina and Molly. But it's a job. And she's been with Kristina since she was a baby. She'd hate leave the little girl with Alexis as her only role model.

That's why she was so happy to hear about Alexis' new daughter. Shocked, but happy. Sam is the complete opposite of Alexis. She has the kind of spirit that would be good for the girls to see and emulate. Sure, it may get them into some trouble down the line. But what fun is being good all the time? How many times can a little girl go to an art museum or to a library and still claim the title of 'little girl'? Sam seems like the type to take them to a ball game or to the lake or to Chuck E. Cheese's. Sam seems like the type to encourage them to take karate as well as ballet. Or to let them watch the television every once in awhile. Maybe color in a Barney coloring book instead of a fact sheet on Animals of the Serengeti.

Not that Kristina isn't a perfectly happy and well adjusted little girl. Viola has done all she can to make sure the girl knows how to relate to other children her age and do things normal kids do. But with Sam there, she believes the girl may actually develop a normal personality.

"Good evening, Viola."

Viola looks up as the door opens, Alexis trudging inside with her arms loaded with books and files.

"You're home early," Viola notes, trying to hide her disappointment. She loves the girls. But her patience for Alexis' perfectionist attitude is starting to wear a little thin.

"I promised Sam and the girls dinner. Can you get the little ones ready? And then you can have the rest of the evening off. I'm going to go change and let Sam know we'll be leaving soon."

Alexis turns to go up the stairs, but is stopped by Viola.

"Sam's not here," she tells her. "She said she had to go out and do a few things and that she'll be back later."

"And you let her?" Alexis asks incredulously. "You just let her up and leave here? She just got out of the hospital. The last thing she needs to be doing is running around town on her own. Viola, that was very irresponsible of you. You should have at least called me."

"To tell you what? That your _grown_ daughter decided to go out for awhile? I didn't realize I was here to be her keeper."

Viola tries to keep her tone as respectful as possible seeing as how Alexis is her employer. But she really can't believe the nerve of the woman.

"You're here to watch out for _all_ of my children. If that's a concept too difficult for you to grasp, then perhaps you should seek employment elsewhere," Alexis snaps, the condescending tone almost too much for Viola to take.

But the image of the new car she just bought flashes in her head, causing Viola to bite her tongue. Like it or not, she needs this well paying job. Not only for the car payments, but also to keep her and her grandmother in the comfortable home they've been able to afford. So she just nods and begs forgiveness through clenched teeth.

_'God don't like ugly,'_ she can hear her grandmother say. One of these days Alexis Davis will get what's coming to her. Viola takes comfort in the belief that one day, hopefully one day very soon, it'll happen and that she'll be there to watch.

She turns to leave the room to go get the girls ready when the sound of the door opening surprises her and stops her in her tracks. It's Sam coming home. This ought to be good. Viola finds a spot near the sofa to stand to watch this confrontation.

- - - - - - - - - -

"Sam!" Alexis runs over to the woman and wraps her arms around her, drawing groans of pain from her daughter. "Where have you been?"

"Ow. Watch it," Sam warns her, too much in pain from the unexpected hug to soften her tone. She grabs onto her back and limps over to the sofa, falling down ungracefully on it. "It's still tender. You can't just grab me like that."

"Precisely the reason why you should have never left here," Alexis argues. "Look at you. You look worse than you've been since you got here. I'm calling the doctor."

"No! Please. I'm fine. I really am," Sam tries to assure her. "I just need a few minutes for this ache to go away."

She leans her head back against the arm of the sofa and breathes deeply to settle herself. Alexis' gasp of horror makes Viola look to see what the problem is. Her own eyes widen in shock, but she's more amused than she is horrified at what she sees.

"Sam, what is that on your neck? Where have you been and who have you been with?"

Viola covers her mouth to keep the sounds of her laughter from escaping, but she can't stop her shoulders from shaking at the force of keeping in her chuckles. Sam looks up and catches her eye, realizing what's so funny and starts laughing too.

"Sam, is that a . . . is that a _hickey_?" she whispers, as if the word itself is taboo and prohibited from being spoken. As if saying it aloud will somehow reach Kristina's delicate mind and give her the same rebellious thoughts.

That only makes Sam laugh even harder, this time taking Viola along for the ride.

"If you must know, yes. It is a hickey. It probably came from the um . .. _time_ I spent with Jason this afternoon."

"_Time_? Is that what you kids are calling it these days?" Viola asks, renewing both her and Sam's giggle fit.

"Viola, could you excuse us," Alexis angrily snaps, glaring at the woman. "I think you should get the girls and take them to Kelly's. I'll have Ric met the three of you there for dinner. It seems I need to have a conversation with my daughter."

The look in her eyes send a chill down Viola's spine. She knows that look. She fears that look. Bad things tend to happen when Alexis gets that look. Poor Sam won't know what hit her.

Viola gives her a sympathetic smile, a bit of a warning for her to be on her guard, but she can see that Sam is already wary of Alexis. Sam nervously twists a ring around her finger, a ring Viola doesn't remember seeing when Sam first moved in. She assumes it's from Jason. That definitely won't make Alexis any less angry. Suddenly, Viola feels very, very sorry for Sam. And suddenly, she's no longer curious about this confrontation between mother and daughter. In fact, she can't get away fast enough.

- - - - - - - - - -

Sam can't help but feel abandoned by the fleeing Viola. She was an ally of sorts against Alexis. Now, she's all alone. Although, she can hardly blame the nanny for leaving. The look on Alexis' face doesn't lead Sam to believe this 'conversation' will be any more pleasant than any of the other 'conversations' her and Alexis have had. She'd just as soon put it off to another day.

"I'm tired," she says with a fake yawn. "I'm going up to rest. So if we can just . . ."

"Sit down," Alexis says, her voice cold and controlled. "You're not going anywhere."

Sam lifts her eyebrow and crosses her arms defiantly across her chest. Yet, her back is aching too much to move, so she just sits there, as Alexis ordered.

"You went to see Jason? Even after he dumped you? What did you do? Go beg him to take you back? Sam, do you have any self respect? Any dignity?"

"I love Jason and Jason loves me," Sam says, defending her actions. "I don't see why we can't be together. If you don't agree . . . well, that's your choice. But this is my life and it's my choice how I live it. And I choose to spend it with Jason."

"And there's nothing I can do to change your mind?" Alexis tries one last time.

"Not a thing. Jason's coming by in the morning to help me pack my things and move back home."

"Home? You call that penthouse your home?" Alexis scoffs, scrunching her nose is disdain. "Your home is here with your family. Not over there with that mobster who's going to get you killed one day."

"You just don't get it," Sam sighs. "_Jason_ is my family. You, Alexis, are just the woman who gave birth to me and then gave me away."

"I had to, Sam. You can't be mad . . ."

"I'm not mad. And I don't hate you for that decision. I came very close to making the same decision when I was pregnant," Sam confesses. "So I understand why you had to do it and I appreciate you caring enough about me to want me to have a good life. But that's really where it ends with us. There won't ever be that mother/daughter bond between us. There won't even be a bond of friendship between us. Too much has happened with us for that to ever happen. I can try to respect you as long as you respect me. I can try to be cordial for the sake of the girls, but that's really all I can offer."

"Okay, then," Alexis says, an eerie calmness to her countenance. A slight crazed look flashes in her eyes for a moment, but when she blinks, it's gone. Sam can almost believe she only imagined it. "I guess that means this is our last night together like this. We can just sit and relax. Maybe have a cup of tea and be . . . how did you put it? Cordial."

Before Sam can agree or not, Alexis is up and in the kitchen. Sam hears dishes clanking around and almost feels sorry for the woman. Nobody likes to hear that their child wants nothing to do with them. But she can't help it. It's the truth. She and Alexis can't get back what they missed out on these past 26 years. All she can do for Alexis is to try to endure these last few more hours with the woman. Hopefully they'll be the last they'll see of each other for awhile.

She sits back and uses these moments alone to think about Jason and how different their life will be. She knows there's going to be a period of adjustment when he gets out of the business. They've already agreed she'll go away for awhile, probably to one of the islands, just to make sure she's safe.

Then there's the situation with Manny. While coming up with her list of people who might want her dead, his name was the last to occur to either her or Jason, but the more they thought about it, the more obvious it became the he was responsible for her shooting. Before he gets out, Jason intends on making sure Manny is dead once and for all. Then they can finally get on with their lives.

She looks down at the ring sparkling on her finger. Jason gave it back to her earlier that day, slipping it on her finger after they had made love.

_'This is the last time this ring leaves your finger,'_ he said to her when the ring was returned to its rightful place on her hand.

_'I promise,'_ she vowed. _'Don't let anyone separate us again.'_

_'I promise,'_ he whispered softly, repeating her vow and sealing it with a kiss.

She doesn't even notice Alexis return and just stand there, staring at her with that crazed look again. If she did, then she'd know to be very afraid.

- - - - - - - - - -

Her eyes closed and a gentle smile on her face, Alexis hates to disturb her. But this must be done. She has no other choice. She's Sam's mother. She has to protect her . . . no matter the cost. Why can't Sam just understand that?

"Sam," she says softly, breaking into the woman's daydreams. "The tea is ready."

She hands her a cup before taking a seat next to her with her own cup. Not knowing what to say, they just sit in silence sipping their tea.

Seconds, minutes, or even an hour later, Alexis finishes her cup, places it on the table and turns to Sam with tears in her eyes. She takes Sam's still half filled cup from the now unconscious woman and places it on the table next to her own.

She didn't want it to come to this, drugging her own daughter, but she had no choice. Sam left her with no other options. Hopefully one day she'll understand. Maybe not now, but one day. One day Sam will see that Alexis is only doing this for her good. She may not ever forgive her, but at least she'll be alive to make that decision. That's all that's important.

To be continued . . .


	4. Chapter 4

Making Adjustments  
4

_How far is Alexis willing to go? _

* * *

Jason knocks on the door for the third time and then checks his watch. 10:00 am. This is when Sam told him to come for her, hoping that Alexis and Ric would be gone for work by then. So why isn't she answering the door? For that matter, why isn't anyone answering the door?

Jason frowns slightly, trying not to get worried despite the feeling in his gut that something has gone horribly wrong. He's about to pull out his cell phone and give Sam a call when the door cracks open.

"Hello?" he calls out, waiting for the door to open some more. A nervous looking woman peeks her head outside, the fear on her face plain to see.

"Viola, right?" he says, remembering her name from the one time Kristina introduced them. "I'm Jason Morgan. I'm here to pick up Sam. Can I come in?"

"It's better that you don't," Viola says, about to close the door.

Jason doesn't know why, but he puts his foot in the way to keep the door open. The frightened woman jumps out of the way, giving him the space to come inside.

"Don't be afraid." He holds up his hands to show her he's no threat. "I just came for Sam. Is she here?"

"I think you need to leave."

"Sam asked me to come over and get her," Jason explains. "I don't want any trouble. I'm just doing as she asks."

When Viola doesn't say anything, Jason makes a decision to end this once and for all.

"Listen, I'm going to go get Sam. I'm not here to hurt anyone or cause anyone any trouble."

He turns to go up the stairs, calling out Sam's name since he doesn't know which room she's in. After getting no answer, he opens all the doors until he finally finds the right one, the one with a picture of the two of them on the bedside table. He picks it up and smiles, remembering when the picture was taken. He sets it back on the table and moves to her closet, noting it still full of clothes, her duffel bag still on the shelf. He moves to the drawers and sees them full as well.

He scratches his head in wonder. The last he spoke with Sam, she was on her way here to pack. But it doesn't appear she made it back here. There's no indication that she has been here since he last saw her. He can't find the clothes she was wearing yesterday. And he notices that her daily dose of birth control pills is still there.

Stumped at where she could be, he decides to go home and put Stan on it. If Alexis stashed her away again, she's probably had a good head start on them. If she hides her as good as she did last time, Jason fears he may never find her.

He runs down the stairs, and on his way out the door, a flash of something catches the corner of his eye. He walks back into the house to check it out, shocked when he finds Viola knocked out on the floor. Checking her pulse, he's relieved to find her still alive. But when he checks her for a head wound, his hand comes back bloody. She needs help and she needs it right now.

In the distance, he hears sirens coming and starts to panic. Something tells him he's in the wrong place at the wrong time. And the sight of him in the house of the new DA bent over an unconscious body with her blood on his hands . . . probably won't go over too well. So he follows his first instinct, even though it may be wrong. He runs.

From the shadows, a gloved hand turns off a camera, an unseen smirk on her face.

"Gotcha."

- - - - - - - - - -

Jason rushes home, stunned to find the cops already there waiting for him.

"Jason Morgan, you're under arrest."

He looks around, trying to not to react to the sight of about seven different officers carrying boxes of papers and files out of his house.

"What's all this about?"

The arresting officer points to the streak of blood on his pants. Viola's blood. He silently curses at his carelessness.

"Want to tell me who that blood belongs to? Is it Sam McCall's?"

"What?" Jason gasps, shocked out of his normal stoic routine at the mention of her name. "What about Sam? Did something happen to her?"

The officer just scowls and shakes his head, grabbing Jason's arms roughly behind his back. He shoves him into the wall next to the door and puts on the cuffs a lot tighter than necessary.

"Take him to the station," he says, shoving Jason out the door to two officers waiting just outside. "Make him tell us where the girl is. Or from the looks of him, where he buried the body."

He turns back inside to his other officers, giving them further instruction.

"Clean it out. Take everything, even the garbage. Make sure we find something for the DA to hang this lowlife mobster with."

- - - - - - - - - -

The police station is a media frenzy, the story obviously having gotten out. _**Local Mob King Pen offs Daughter of DA**_. She realizes that now is the time for the performance of a life time.

The cops parade Jason inside and just as they reach the interrogation room, she runs up, smacking him across the face. The whole room gets so quiet you can hear a pin drop.

"Where is she, you monster? What have you done with my daughter?"

"Alexis, calm down. I didn't do anything," he tries to say.

"You were in my home. You assaulted my nanny. And you took my daughter," Alexis accuses him. "You're going to fry for this."

She nods her head at the officers and they take Jason into the interrogation room. She turns to the reporters, giving them their photo op.

"Ms. Davis, do you believe Jason Morgan killed your daughter?"

"Ms. Davis, will you prosecute this case yourself?"

"Ms. Davis, is it true your Nanny Cam caught Mr. Morgan in the act?"

"Ms. Davis, was this a warning to you as the new DA from the local mob?"

On and on the questions came, but she declined to answer them. She has to get out of here. Now that Jason's tucked away nice and safe and out of her way, there's one other thing she needs to take care of.

- - - - - - - - - -

Mac looks over the so called facts of the case, the knot in his stomach growing bigger and bigger with each word he reads. This just doesn't add up. Not at all. He's known Jason for a long time. And the man may be a criminal, but nothing like this.

He next flips through Jason's statement, his eyebrow raising in shock at the man's attention to detail. He'd make a fine detective if he already weren't entrenched on the wrong side of the law.

"So according to your statement, you estimate Sam went missing sometime yesterday?" Mac asks him, trying to find the woman rather than participate in Alexis' obvious witch trial against Jason. The man may be guilty of a lot of things, but this isn't one of them. "You claim the last time you saw her was yesterday afternoon."

"When we came in here, yes."

Mac nods, remembering that visit. They refused to make a statement, but they came to him 'unofficially' to let him know their suspicions about Manny being the one who shot Sam. After their explanation of the event of the shooting that night, Mac couldn't help but agree with them that Jason wasn't the target. He agreed to put extra men on finding Manny. But what if Manny found Sam first? What if this is his work?

"Do you think it's possible Manny took her?" he asks Jason, voicing his internal question. "Maybe he really is the one responsible for shooting Sam and just wanted to finish the job."

Jason bites his lip, as if thinking hard before shaking his head.

"No. There wasn't a struggle. Sam wouldn't have gone peacefully with him, no matter how hurt she was. Plus, I'm sure the nanny would have heard something. Although," Jason frowns, pausing to think some more.

"What are you thinking?" Mac asks, finding himself truly interested. Something weird is going on here and for the first time, Mac doesn't think Jason has anything to do with it.

"Viola. The nanny. She was acting strange this morning. I think she may know more than she's letting on. I think she's covering."

"For who?" Mac's eyes grow wide as soon as he asks the question, realization suddenly sinking in. "Alexis? You think Alexis is behind this?"

"Wouldn't be the first time," Jason shrugs. "She took Sam from the hospital after her surgery. She took Kristina when she was a baby. Alexis tends to . . . go to extremes when she's determined. Maybe Sam told her we were back together and that she was coming home with me today. Maybe Alexis didn't like that and decided to stop Sam any way she could."

"You may be on to something," Mac says, nodding his head in agreement. "As little sense as it makes for the DA to be behind this, it oddly makes more sense than you being behind this."

"Thanks . . . I think?" Jason says, unsure if that was a compliment or not.

"This just didn't feel right, blaming you for this," Mac comments. "Jason, you'd just as soon die before hurting a woman you loved. I saw it when you were with Robin. I saw it last night when you were in here with Sam."

"So, am I free to go? I need to find Sam."

"Not quite. There's still a matter of all the files we confiscated from your home. I'm sure Alexis used the accusation of you kidnapping and hiding Sam as grounds to obtain a warrant to search your home. I'm sorry to say that if anything illegal shows up, then . . ."

"They won't find anything," Jason shrugs nonchalantly. "In addition to the Manny situation, Sam and I also discussed, um . . . a change in career for me. I became a legitimate business man as of 6:45 this morning."

"Not that you were anything but before," Mac adds with a smirk. "I hope this doesn't come out sounding condescending, but I'm proud of you. You're a talented young man with a lot of promise. You can make a real difference in people's lives if you put your mind to it."

Jason has to hold back an unexpected rush of emotions.

"Um, thanks," he says, clearing his throat. "No one has ever told me that. Not that I can remember, anyway. No one's ever believed I could do anything worthwhile. No one except for Sam."

"Right now, I believe Sam is believing in you to find her," Mac reminds him. "If what you say about your business is true, then you're free to go. I'll go get the paperwork started."

"Commissioner Scorpio," a clerk calls to him on his way out the door. "Officers Laarson and Drayton called in. They tailed DA Davis to a private hospital on the other side of town. They thought you might like to know."

He nods his thanks and waits for the young woman to leave before turning to Jason.

"You had her followed?" Jason asks.

"After what you and Sam suggested about Manny yesterday, I wanted to make sure the DA and her family were safe. But they couldn't go on duty until this morning, so that would have given Alexis plenty of time to take Sam away without anyone noticing. Maybe to this private hospital?"

"It's worth checking out," Jason shrugs. "If you go, then I'm going with you."

Mac just nods. He was expecting that. And oddly enough, he wouldn't have it any other way.

- - - - - - - - - -

Alexis parks her car and gets out, unaware of the car that followed her stopping halfway down the block. She has a feeling that someone is watching her, but can't see who it could be and proceeds inside the hospital. She takes the elevator to the psychiatric ward and signs in.

"How's my daughter today?" she asks the nurse on duty, giving her a cheerful smile.

"Not a bit of trouble. She's been sleeping peacefully since you brought her in. You can go sit with her. The doctor will be ready to begin treatment shortly."

Alexis thanks her and walks down the hall to Sam's room. She warned the doctor to keep Sam sedated. Fortunately he seems to have heeded her warning if Sam's been asleep this whole time. If she wakes up before it's time, it would ruin the whole thing.

"Hello, Sweetheart," she says cheerfully to the unconscious woman, kissing her on the forehead. "The nurse tells me you had a very good night. Hopefully, you'll be waking up soon and all of this will be behind us. You'll be able to have a fresh start with your life."

"That's the plan."

Alexis looks up to see the doctor walking into the room with a big smile. He's carrying a syringe full of a brownish colored liquid, something Alexis has paid dearly for. But it'll all be worth it.

"Will this hurt her at all?" Alexis asks as the doctor injects the contents of the syringe into Sam's IV. "What are the side effects."

"A few headaches. And of course some confusion due to her memory lapse," the doctor explains.

"And you're sure you've used this before . . . successfully," she wants to be sure.

"It was a medicine developed here for the treatment of depression. But the side effects I mentioned - the confusion and the memory gaps - proved to be useful with other patients as well. Patients who needed to stop smoking, drinking, or gambling; patients trying to lose weight; and patients, like your daughter, who are in dangerous and unhealthy relationships."

The doctor monitors Sam closely as her heart and brain activity begin to increase.

"It's working," he smiles. "She'll be coming around soon. And like I said, there will be some confusion. Just talk to her. And whatever you tell her now, will replace in her subconscious the negative habits and inappropriate behaviors from before."

Alexis is skeptical, but she does what the doctor says. For nearly an hour she sits and talks to her, hoping against hope that it works. This has to work. Because if it doesn't, there's only one other thing she can do to keep Jason away from Sam. But she's not quite sure she's ready to have his blood on her hands.

"Ms. Davis, there's a situation out here. Police Commissioner Scorpio would like to speak to you."

Alexis sighs and reluctantly leaves Sam's side, giving her forehead one more kiss. She doesn't know how Mac found her so quickly, but it doesn't matter. Sam's treatment is done and that's all that counts. He'll probably want to know how Sam got here when not two hours ago she was accusing Jason of taking her. But she'll make something up. Who's Mac going to believe, the DA or a mobster? She's not worried.

She walks down the hall and bumps into a doctor with his face buried in a chart. But she doesn't pay any attention to him and continues on her way.

The "doctor" holds his breath in anticipation until she passes, sighing a sigh of relief when he makes it to Sam's room unnoticed. He takes off the doctor's outfit and tosses it in the corner of the room before heading over to the bed.

"Sam," he whispers reverently. He lifts her hand and presses a kiss there. "Sam, can you hear me? It's Jason."

Her eyes scrunch as if she's in pain before they slowly blink open.

"Wha . . . what are you doing here? What do you want?"

He sits back in shock at her words, stung when she jerks her hand away from him, hurt at the angry expression on her face.

"Sam?"

"You need to leave," she cries, fearful tears streaming down her face. "Where's my mom? She said she'd take care of me and make sure you didn't bother me again."

"Sam, what's going on?" Jason asks, her confusion scaring him. "You love me and I love you. I came to get you from Alexis. She took me from you."

"Before you could kill me," Sam accuses. "Get away from me before I scream. Leave now!"

"Okay," he agrees, stepping away from the bed. "I won't touch you again, but you've got to listen to me. I love you, Sam. I won't hurt you."

"That's what they all say," she says, rolling her eyes. "You're no different. All you've done is hurt me. I don't love you, Jason. I let you control me and use me. That's not love. That's a sick addiction to an even sicker situation. I won't let you abuse me anymore."

"What has Alexis been telling you?"

"Just the truth."

Jason spins around to find Alexis behind him, a contrite looking Mac standing next to her.

"My daughter wants you gone. I think you should go," Alexis warns him.

"What did you do to her? You people are sick here, messing around in her mind like this. Alexis, how could you let them do this to her?" Jason yells, jerking out of Mac's grasp when the man tries to pull him out of Alexis' face.

"Leave her alone!" Sam screams, finally making good on her promises. "You're just a monster who hurts me and the people I love. Get out of here. Get out of my life. I never want to see you again!"

Jason stands in shock, his stare bouncing from Sam to Alexis and back again several times before her words fully sink in. But even if she didn't say anything, the hate in her eyes is enough to tell him all he needs to know. Alexis swore she's keep Sam from him. Looks like she finally succeeded.

"Let's go, Jason. I don't want to have to arrest you," Mac says gently.

Jason just nods, not knowing what else to do.

"I do love you, Sam. And you love me," he says. "Your head may not believe it, but your heart knows it. Listen to your heart, Sam. You didn't let Alexis win before. Don't let her win now."

With one last look, he does the one thing he never swore he'd do to her again . . . he walks away.

To be continued . . .


	5. Chapter 5

Making Adjustments  
5

_How far is Alexis willing to go? Too far!_

_

* * *

_

"It's good to be home again, isn't it?" Alexis asks cheerfully, holding the door open for Sam. She looks around the foreign house and wonders why she can't feel the connection to it. This was her home. Granted she only lived here for about a week, but it was her home. Then why is it when she thinks of that word, she thinks of a different place all together?

"I think I'm going to go up and rest," Sam says quietly, giving Alexis a tired smile.

"Are you okay, Honey?"

"I'm fine," Sam tries to assure her. But even her words sound hollow in her own ears. "Just tired. It was stressful at the hospital last night. I didn't sleep well."

"Well, get some rest," Alexis says, trying not to sound concerned. "I'm sure you'll feel better later. Molly and Kristina will be anxious to see you."

Sam tries to hide her wince at the mention of Kristina's name. She's not sure why thoughts of the little girl bring her actual, physical pain. But everytime she hears her name or sees her face, Sam can't stop the involuntary physical reaction.

If Alexis notices, she doesn't say anything. She just walks Sam up to her room and waits at the door until she gets into bed. Sam closes her eyes and prays for a dreamless sleep. She doesn't get her wish.

--

_"I want you to come with me. I want you to see her. I want you to see Kristina. I want you to see her lying in her bed. I want you to see how pale she is. I want you to see that her chest is barely moving. I want you to see that she's dying and that you can save her, but you won't."_

_"Don't say that. Please don't talk . . ."_

_"Please, I'll make you see what you're doing, because you're letting her die. You're going to let her heart stop beating, you're going to let her slip away, and you're going to stand there and you're going to do nothing. Where's your compassion? For god's sake, where's your humanity? How are you going to be able to live with yourself knowing that you could have saved her life and you didn't? I want you to look at her because I can't make you induce labor, but I can by god make you see the price of your selfishness because it's easy to ignore death when it's not staring you in the face, when it's down the hall in some corridor, when it's somebody else's child. I want you to look at my daughter!"_

_"Ok, I will do it!"_

_"I want you to see what you've done! If she dies it's on your head!"_

_"I will induce my labor for you, ok? Oh -- ow!"_

- - - - - - - - - -

Sam sits up in the bed, ripped abruptly from her not so peaceful sleep. So much for not having any dreams. She reaches over with a shaking hand and grabs the glass of water on her nightstand. She tries to take a few sips, but her stomach rebels, the quesiness almost making her lose the small breakfast she was given at the hospital.

It was the same dream from before. Alexis yelling, screaming at her. Jason coming in and saving her. She doesn't know what to make of it.

The strange thing is that she remembers everything about that day. She remembers Kristina being so sick and she remembers going to labor and waking up learning that although her baby died, her stem cells saved Kristina's life. But her memories of that day are as if someone told her about it. Almost as if she's watching it happen to someone else. In her dream, she lives it. Every painful moment of it. Every hateful word her mother screamed at her. And also the loving way Jason wrapped his arms around her.

She sucks in a surprised breath at the thought of Jason. He's another enigma. When she _thinks_ of him, she thinks of pain, anguish, trouble, and danger. She knows she's better off without him. But her heart is telling her something different. That dream is telling her something different.

_'This is the last time this ring leaves your finger.'_

She looks down at her finger, the ring sparkling like a star in the night sky. For some reason, those words mean something to her. She remembers him saying them to her just a few days ago, but for some reason, she can't feel what she felt when he said them. But at the same time, she can't seem to take off the ring either. It's the only thing that seems real to her.

She decides to leave it for now. Instead she goes downstairs to see about the rest of the family.

"Sam. Welcome home," Ric says. He sounds cordial, but not exactly genuine. "Are you feeling better?"

"A little. I'm still a little fuzzy and confused about some things. I guess Jason . . .," she pauses and shrugs, not quite sure what shes's thinking. "I guess he had more of a hold on me than I thought. It's a good thing Alexis helped me when she did. I mean, he's a bad guy. He kills people. He kept me trapped in an abusive relationship. It's good I'm away from that, right?"

"Are you trying to convince me or yourself?" Ric asks her curiously. "Because two days ago, you were convinced that losing Jason was the end of your world. What changed your mind all of a sudden?"

"The doctor Alexis took me to helped me to . . . "

"Doctor? I thought the two of you went to a spa for the day. What doctor are you talking about?"

"I don't know," Sam shrugs.

"You don't know? You go away for a day, come back suddenly not hating your mother and hating the man you loved more than anything in the world? And you don't know how that happened?"

"Ric, what are you talking about? Alexis is my mother. Of course I don't hate her. And Jason is the man who kept me trapped in a dangerous and abusive relationship."

"Stop saying that!" Ric snaps, startling Sam with his outburst. "Those aren't your words or your thoughts, Sam. What's really going on?"

"No, Ric. _You_ need to stop. Why are you trying to make me doubt what I'm feeling?"

She turns and runs back upstairs, not wanting to deal with him anymore.

He just sighs and shakes his head.

"Because it's not what you're really feeling."

He has a horrible feeling of his own growing in the pit of his stomach. When Alexis gets back from the museum with the girls, she's going to have a lot of explaining to do. Something tells him he's not going to like what he hears.

- - - - - - - - - -

Sam waits until she hears the door to Alexis and Ric's bedroom to close before sneaking down the stairs. She doesn't remember ever having to sneak out. Cody didn't care enough about her to notice her comings and goings. Funny how she can remember those days as well as feel them fully. Her fuzziness only appears to be where Jason and Alexis are concerned.

Just as she reaches the bottom of the stairs, the door bell rings. She ducks out of site as Ric comes to answer the door.

"Viola? I thought . . ."

"I'm sorry to just show up like this, Mr. Lansing," she says, looking nervously into the room. "I saw Ms. Davis with the kids downtown and knew she wouldn't be here. I just wanted to give you this."

Sam watches Ric take piece of paper from her and read it quickly, his eyebrows furrowing with tension.

"You're quitting?" he asks her.

"Effective immediately. I can't work here anymore."

She turns to leave, and when Ric grabs her arm, she jerks away from him.

"Wait a minute, Viola. We've been good to you. I think you at least owe us some kind of explanation. Is this about how Jason attacked you the other day? I can assure you, that won't happen again. Sam has told him she doesn't want to see him anymore and we're in the process of getting a restraining order."

"Mr. Morgan didn't attack me. He was upstairs looking for Sam at the time. There's no way he could have hit me."

"Then who . . ." Ric pauses midsentence, a thought coming to him that he can't believe he's even considering. "You think Alexis did it? Is that why you waited until she wouldn't be here? Are you afraid of her?"

"I have to go," Viola says, shaking her head. "Just watch your back. Those girls are her life. She'd never physically harm them. But if anyone dares get in her way . . ."

Viola leaves Ric standing in the doorway in complete shock. Sam waits a few minutes before deciding to join him.

"Do you think it's true?" she asks, startling him with her seemingly sudden appearance.

"I don't know what to think anymore, Sam. I honestly don't know what's going on with Alexis. She's done things that . . . " he sighs, shaking his head. "I just don't know what to think."

"Me neither." She goes to sit on the couch. He follows suit, sitting next to her. Both are trying to make sense of what's going on.

"Do you know that I can feel my heart breaking when I look at Kristina? Or even when I think about her or hear her name? And when I dream about that day my baby died, I feel so much hatred for Alexis that I feel like I'm going to burst. Where is all of that coming from?"

"Sam, Alexis is your mother. She's very protective of her girls. She'd do anything for them," Ric starts, trying to explain what could possibly be motivating Alexis. "You were shot and dying when she found out about you. She blamed Jason and his lifestyle, so she did whatever she had to do to get you away from him."

"Jason _is_ dangerous. He's a criminal. He kills people for a living, Ric. Why would I want to be near someone like that?"

"Why are you still wearing his ring?" he counters, pointing down at her hand.

"Sam, two days ago, you loved Jason with your whole heart. You didn't care about his job or what he did or the danger you faced being with him."

"Then why . . . "

"I don't know," he interrupts. "I don't know anything. But you need to figure out what you think and feel. Not what Alexis has made you believe you think and feel."

"Alexis is my mother. She wouldn't hurt me," Sam insists. "She only wants what's best for me."

"But it's your life, Sam. You need to figure out how to live it for yourself. Not for Alexis. Not for Jason. For you. You need to figure out what you really want."

Sam just nods. Ric is right. She doesn't know anything anymore. All she does know is that being in this house isn't helping her confusion any. She needs to get out.

"I'm going out. I need to think."

If she thought about it, she would have gone somewhere safe. The park. Kelly's. The docks. But she didn't think. She just followed her heart and was shocked to find herself an hour later standing in front of Harborview Towers.

- - - - - - - - - -

"What is it? What's the emergency? Is it Sam?"

Alexis manages to get all of that out before even closing the door. Ric feels bad for worrying her, but he didn't have a choice. There's no other way she would have let Emily take the girls with her over to Sonny's otherwise.

"No emergency," he says, trying to calm her. "We really need to talk, though."

"But the girls . . ."

"They're fine at Sonny's. I called and made sure Leticia would watch out for them. Glass of wine?"

He puts the glass in her hand, earning a suspicious glare from her.

"What's all this about, Ric?"

"Actually, I think you're the one who should be answering the questions here. What exactly have you been up to these past few days?"

"In what respect?" she asks, feigning innocence.

"Oh, I don't know. Maybe you can start with explaining why our nanny up and quits on us. Or why your previously distant and aloof daughter who merely tolerated you on a good day, now practically worships the ground you walk on. How she can hate the man who two days ago meant the world to her. And all after some mysterious trip to an equally mysterious doctor."

"You obviously have this all figured out," she snaps. "So if you have something to accuse me of, then why don't you just get right to it, Counselor."

He ignores her biting, sardonic tone and decides to just jump right into this with her.

"Tell me about the doctor you took Sam to. What did he do? Drug her? Brainwash her?"

"He didn't _brainwash_ her," Alexis scoffs. "He merely . . . reconditioned her reactions to certain stimuli."

"Namely you and Jason. He made her forget about her love for Jason and her hate for you."

"Not _forget_. She just reacts differently now. She knows the truth now. That I am her mother and that I love her. That my love will protect her while Jason's _"love"_ will only hurt her."

"And that's okay with you? That some quack screws around in your daughter's brain. You think letting him do that to her is going to "fix" her. What about side effects, Alexis?"

"She'll love her family and hate Jason. She'll be safe and happy. What kind of side effects could there be?"

"Dreams. Memories. Misplaced anger and hate, namely at Kristina. She feels in her dreams, you know. And her feelings are confusing her. You made it so that she doesn't hate you. So now who do you think she blames for her daughter's death?"

"Kristina? Her own sister?" Alexis drums her fingers on the wine glass, the wheels in her head turning. "We'll have to have the doctor fix that the next time, I suppose."

"Next time?" Ric gasps in shock. "Alexis, you aren't seriously taking her back, are you?"

"You aren't seriously trying to stop me, are you?" she challenges him, the wild look in her eye scaring him. He remembers Viola's warning and sees now that the woman had reason to fear.

"You really did it didn't you? You hit knocked Viola out and then took Sam to frame Jason, didn't you?"

"And if the cops had done their jobs, he should be in jail. I practically handed him to them on a silver platter. I still can't believe they didn't find any evidence of criminal activity in his apartment."

"Alexis, this is not right. You can't take the law into your own hands like this. You're the DA. I can't in good conscious let you get away with this. You need some help. Maybe take a few weeks off and try to cope with all the changes that have occurred."

"You think I'm crazy?" she asks, hurt at his accusation.

"No, Alexis. Not crazy," he assures her. "You're just stressed right now."

He stands up and goes to the phone, not really sure to call. Probably Lainey Winters. She can evaluate Alexis and then recommend a 'vacation' to give her some time away from all the pressure.

"You think I'm crazy. I'll show you crazy," he hears her mutter behind him just as the sharp edge enters his back.

He gasps in pain, dropping the phone to the floor. His first thought is one of disbelief that she would stab him. His second thought is that he wishes he had decided against leaving the cheese knife on the table. When that thought threatens to make him laugh, it is then that it occurs to him that he's about to die.

She shoves the knife in even deeper and the pain brings him to his knees. He finally collapses onto the floor, his last, labored breaths making him cough up blood.

She stands over him as if in a daze, watching him gasp for breath. His blood begins to pool around her feel and she jumps back to keep it from getting on her shoes.

"Sleep, my love," she whispers to Ric. "Jason will be joining you soon. Then me and my girls will truly be free."

He tries to call out to her as she walks away and out the door. But he just can't get the strength. And when breathing becomes too much of a chore, he stops.

To be concluded!!


	6. Chapter 6

Making Adjustments  
6

_Alexis has gone way, WAY too far._

* * *

She remembers with a smile the way he carried her over the threshold that one day.

Her cheeks flush when she remembers slamming him into the desk and kissing the life out of him.

And what they did on the floor by the sofa . . . well, let's just say that hate him or not, she wouldn't mind trying that again with him any day of the week.

The fireplace. The pool table. The wall next to the front door. The stairs. The balcony. Even the downstairs closet. Is there any place in this one room alone they _haven't_ had sex?

Sam tries not to think about it, but she can't help all the memories. And the feelings they're bringing up are far from hateful.

"What are you doing here?"

He sounds mad. She can understand it. She screamed at him. Told him to leave her alone. And now she's here having flashes of all the hot sex they used to have.

"Jason, I . . ."

"You told me to leave you alone. I think you should do the same."

He goes to the door and holds it open, waiting on her to leave. But she can't. Just like she can't take off her ring. Just like she couldn't stay away. There's just something about him.

"I don't know what's going on with me. I have all these memories and the feelings just don't match up," she tries to explain.

"What do you expect me to do?" he asks, his voice low to hide the tears she can see building in his eyes. "You looked at me the other day as if you hated me."

"I do," she admits. "But I don't know why. I hear a voice in my head telling me that you're bad for me and that you're dangerous and that I don't need you in my life. But my heart . . ."

"What does your heart say?"

"My heart feels you catching me when I fall. My heart feels you holding me when my baby died. My heart makes me ask myself how I can hate a man that looks at me the way that you look at me."

He walks over to her and slowly reaches his hand out to her. Shyly, she reaches back, allowing him to take her hand in his own. He lifts it to his chest and places it over his heart.

"Hear what my heart is saying to you," he whispers, his stormy blue eyes drawing her in. She feels herself drifting towards him, ignoring her head and the words screaming for her to stop.

"Jason," she whispers, closing her eyes as his lips close over hers.

_How can this be so wrong when it feels so right?_

She pushes him away, stepping away from him as he tries to wrap his arms around her.

"I'm sorry," he apologizes, sticking his hands in his pockets to keep from reaching for her again.

"No. I'm sorry. I want this. I want to love you, but something is stopping me," she sighs, tears rolling down her cheeks. "Why is this happening to me?"

"Alexis," he answers, frowning when she shakes her head, refusing to believe it. "She let them do something to you at that hospital."

"No. She was helping me. My mother loves me. She loves me and only wants what's best for me. And that isn't you, Jason."

"Maybe you're right," he shrugs. "But I do know that you're the best thing that has ever happened to me. And I'll tell you everyday how much I love you until you begin to believe it again."

"What if I can't?"

"You're here now, aren't you? You still have on my ring, don't you?"

"I love this ring," she says, looking down on it with a smile. "I remember when you gave it to me that night after the train wreck and before your surgery. You didn't even know me then. Yet, you remembered our love. Do you think the same thing can happen for me?"

"I guess we'll see." His smile makes her smile. The hopeful look in his eyes makes her feel like anything is possible. "Stay here. I have something else for you."

She walks over to the couch while he goes upstairs. She sits down and closes her eyes for a moment, startled when she feels someone walk up behind her.

"Where's my surprise."

"Right here."

She gasps at the familiar, yet unexpected voice behind her.

"Surprised?"

"How did you get in here, Alexis? How did you know I'd be here?"

"Just luck, I guess. I didn't expect for you to be here. But this is obviously how things are supposed to happen."

"What things? What are you talking about?" Sam shivers when she sees the look in her mother's eyes. It reminds her of the day her baby died and all the feelings she felt towards Alexis that day.

"I'm here to protect you, Sam. After today, Jason won't ever be able to hurt you again."

Alexis raises her hand to run her hands through her hair and Sam sees the blood on them.

"Alexis, what did you do?" Sam asks her, still staring at her bloodied hands. "Who's blood is that?"

"I made my sacrifice for you and your sisters. To prove how much I love you. Now it's your turn, Sam. If you love me, make the ultimate sacrifice for me."

"Ultimate sacrifice?"

They both look up as Jason walks down the stairs, stopping when he catches a glimpse of Alexis with Sam.

"There he is," she says, the crazed look now constant in her eyes. "His death will free us all, Sam."

"Alexis, no! What is wrong with you?" Sam shrieks, slapping the knife Alexis tries to give her onto the floor.

"Are you saying that I'm crazy?"

The speed at which Alexis turns to Sam and grabs her around her neck is shocking to both Jason and Sam. She has Sam down on the couch before Jason can move from his spot.

"Sam!" he calls out, finally taking action and running over to the two women. It takes a great deal of strength to pull Alexis off of Sam, leaving the younger woman gasping desperately for air.

Jason struggles to hold onto Alexis and grunts in pain when her elbow makes contact with his groin. Using his distraction to her advantage, Alexis twists out of his grasp and gets the knife from the floor.

"Don't ever touch me or my daughter ever again!" Alexis screams, running towards Jason and sticking the knife in his gut. She gives it a twist for good measure, throwing her head back and laughing when his warm, sticky blood gushes out onto her hands.

Ric had put up no fight, so it surprises her to feel Jason's hands on her wrists, keeping her from pushing the knife in any further. His pain is obvious in his eyes, but so is his determination to live.

"Let go of him," Sam manages to squeak out, her voice still weak from when Alexis strangled her.

Alexis looks up, stunned to see a gun pointing towards her. But she mistakes Sam's intentions and gives the girl a proud smile. She pulls out the knife and lets Jason fall to the floor, moaning in agony as he falls on his wound.

"Want to finish him off yourself?" Alexis preens. "Go ahead, my precious one. Make Mommy proud."

"No _Mommy_," Sam says sarcastically. "I will not kill him. And I won't let you kill him either."

"Do it, Sam," Alexis yells. "Do it now. Then he'll be out of your life forever."

"That's not what I want," Sam sobs. "I want him to be in my life. Because he iis/i my life. I love him."

"You love me too," Alexis says. "You don't want me to die, do you? What do you think he's going to do if given the chance? You have to kill him, Baby. That's the only way to save me. I'm your mother."

"Stop getting in my head!"

"Do it, Sam. Pull the trigger," Alexis continues, stepping closer and closer to Sam with each word without her even realizing. "A bullet right in that damaged brain of his and he won't even feel it."

"No!"

"Do it! Now!" Alexis screams, raising the knife over her head, aiming for Sam's throat.

A shot rings out and Alexis freezes. The knife falls from her hand and she falls to the floor along with it.

Sam lets out a gut wrenching sob and kneels down next to her fallen mother.

"Alexis! Alexis!" She shakes the woman, praying for her eyes to open. "Don't you die on me."

Sam rolls her over to try to find a wound, surprised to see just a flesh wound in her upper arm. She looks up and watches Jason stagger over to her, dropping his weapon on the ground.

"I just winged her. Call 9-1-1 and she should be fine."

His eyes roll back into his head and he collapses, the blood stain on his shirt having spread faster than Sam thought possible. With all that blood, he can't have a single drop left in his body, Sam fears.

She quickly grabs up all the weapons and sets them out of the way on the desk. Then she calls for an ambulance, explaining what happened and begging them to hurry.

"Jason," she whispers to the man, trying to rouse him. If he passes out, she's not sure he'll ever wake up. "Come on, Jason. Let me see those beautiful eyes of yours."

"Sam," he groans, his body starting to shake from shock. Sam grabs the blanket off the couch and covers him with it. "Love you."

"Jason, don't," she cries, shaking her head. "Don't you die on me either."

"Reach into my pocket," he whispers. "It's your surprise."

"That's right. You did promise me something, didn't you?" She reaches in his pocket and gasps when her fingers pull out her necklace. The diamond star he bought her from Italy.

"My necklace," she smiles. She puts it around her neck, knowing she did the right thing when a look of peace crosses his face.

"No matter what you forget, always remember that I love you," he gasps out, coughing from the blood threatening to choke him.

A tear drips down her face and lands on his cheek. She bends over and kisses it away. Then she takes his hand and places it on her heart.

"Hear what it says to you," she whispers.

"I hear it," he smiles gently, his eyes closing peacefully. "I love you, too."

"No!" she sobs, holding his still body close to her. "Come on, Jason. Not like this. Please. Don't leave me."

"Sam," she hears Alexis groan, causing all the anger and hate to rise up in her. "Help me, Sweetheart. We have to get out of here."

Alexis uses the desk to pull herself up and then leans against it for support.

"Please. Let's go. I'll make sure the police file this as a mob hit. But we have to get out of here."

"You killed him," Sam says, almost robotically, too in shock to register much of anything. "You have become what you claim to hate so much about him. You're a killer."

"No, Sam. I did it for you, Baby. You're my daughter. I have to protect you, no matter what the cost."

"You tried to kill me! How is that protecting me?"

Alexis just sighs wearily and shakes her head, the disappointment in her eyes clear to anyone.

"I didn't want it to come to this."

Sam curses to herself when she sees Alexis grab one of the guns she put on the desk. She can't believe she so stupidly left them out in the open like that. Then again, she thought both Jason and Alexis were down for the count.

"Alexis, put the gun down," Sam begs her. "You can't kill me. I'm your daughter."

"You don't love me. Not like you loved him. I had to pay a doctor to brainwash you, Sam," Alexis barks out angrily. "How pathetic is that? I had to _make_ my own daughter love me."

"What about Kristina and Molly? What will you tell them happened to their sister? To their father? How are you going to tell them you killed us both?"

"Ric was a sacrifice. He had to die. You're dying by choice, Sam. For not loving me."

"But I do," Sam cries. "Mom, I do love you."

"Thank you, Baby," Alexis says, a sad smile growing on her face. "That makes me so happy to hear you say that."

She wraps her arms around Sam, the gun pressing dangerously to the back of her skull. Sam tries to ease out of her embrace, but they're both shocked when the doors fly open.

"Police! Freeze!"

Alexis panics and grabs Sam around the neck, holding the gun to her head.

"Stop or I'll shoot her!"

"No!" Sam screams. "Mac, help. She stabbed Jason and killed Ric. Stop her!"

"Shut up with all that noise," Alexis orders her. "I can't think with you screaming and crying every 5 minutes.

Alexis starts to back Sam towards the balcony doors, hoping to make it to the fire escape that she knows is there.

"Alexis, don't do this," Mac warns her, making his men stay back until he can talk her down.

Alexis manages to get the balcony doors open and step outside.

"Stay back, Mac. Or I'm throwing her over."

"Mom, no," Sam sobs, pleading with Alexis to stop. "Don't do this. It's not too late to get you some help."

"I am sick and tired of people calling me crazy!" Alexis yells. She throws Sam down the ground and aims the gun at her. Before she can even think about pulling the trigger, a chorus of bullets sound, the officers firing to defend Sam.

Seven or eight bullets hit their target, her body jerking when each one hits. The force of the final bullet in her head knocks her back, her body flying over the edge and landing on the sidewalk below with a sickening splat.

Mac runs out and looks over the edge, saddened at having to do that to a person he considered a friend. He bends next to Sam and help her stand, her stare fixed on some distant spot as she mentally withdraws from the events of the day.

"Get the medics up here now," he barks to his officers. "How's Jason?"

"He's lost a lot of blood. But he's still breathing, barely. He's still alive."

"You hear that, Sam? He's still alive," he whispers to the catatonic woman. "He's going to need you to pull through this. Don't let him down."

He holds her close, trying to rub warmth into her freezing limbs because it's all he can do. That, and pray. He prays that both Jason and Sam can survive both the physical and mental traumas of the day. Because they're only going to get through this together.

- - - - - - - - - -

The service was sad yet dignified. Despite her death and the events leading up to it, many people turned out to show their respects. Mostly out of sympathy for the two motherless little girls who shouldn't have to live with the stigma of what their mother had done, but also for the many years she served the community.

_"It's so unfair that she had to die,"_ many had whispered when they didn't think Sam could hear. _"How could her daughter choose her mobster lover over her own mother?"_

As usual, the gossip mongers had it wrong. And it bothered Sam more than she cared to admit.

"Don't listen to them. Alexis did this to herself," Ric assures her.

From the way Alexis spoke, Sam had assumed the man was dead. Fortunately for him, Viola decided to return to the house to pick up some things she left behind. She called the paramedics just in time to save his life. And with Alexis gone, she decided to stay on with Ric and help him care for them, especially while he recovers.

"She's dead because of me, Ric. All she wanted was my love. She just went about it the wrong way. It might have taken some time, but I think I would have grown to love her."

"Alexis never was a very patient woman," Ric smiles in remembrance. Despite what the woman had done, she was his wife and he loved her. For the sake of his girls, he has to try to keep that love alive. "She had to live life on her terms. And make everyone around her live them on her terms as well."

"I hated her for that. I really did," Sam admits. "But she was my mother, Ric. I wouldn't have hated her forever. But now, now that we don't have anymore time . . . I just might."

"That's understandable," he nods, patting her on the shoulder. "I have to get the girls home. Are you going to be all right?"

She looks across the cemetery at the man standing against the tree, giving her this moment to grieve for what she's lost.

"Yeah," she smiles, giving Jason a brief wave. "I'm going to be just fine."

The End :-)


End file.
